My Journey

Category: Hobbies

  • nobody

    Nobody can hurt me,Like me. I know exactly where,To place the knife. Where to cut and,When to twist, To inflict the most pain. My mind is a bad neighborhood,A place, sometimes most of the time, even I don’t want to be. But it’s mine.For better,And worse.

  • Poetry

    I’ve written about my love for a good quote and over the years that love has turned towards poetry. First, just reading or listening to it as it popped up in my day to day and now to seeking it out. I’ve found so many wonderful poets whose words have inspired me, made me smile,…

  • Mocking

    Every word of praise from you,Felt mocking. You always asked me why I stopped,Whenever you noticed me trying. That’s Why.

  • avoidance

    I avoid feelingBecause it’s uncomfortable And I’m afraidBecause I don’t know how to deal withEmotionsIf I allow them to flood in.I don’t feel the emotion, So I can’t even name itBut I do feel it as a simple, primal commandRUN!RUN!!So I doI pick up this distraction deviceAnd disappear for hoursBrain off,Scrolling.Scrolling..Scrolling…When I take a look…

  • I watch, but I don’t

    I watch YouTube videos every day and every day I want to create a video and every day I don’t I have multiple ideas, even multiple scripts But I don’t I hate the way I lookI hate the way I soundI don’t have enough timeI’m not creative enoughI’m too oldI’m too dumbPeople that I don’t…

  • Reclaiming My Time

    I’ve been spending too much time doom/rage/mindlessly scrolling on social media. Today I finished The Chaos Machine by Max Fisher and even before I finished it I was cutting back on social media. It’s a well written, meticulously sourced book and left me feeling pretty bad about the amount of time and energy I put…

  • Frozen in time

    We had snow this week and I wanted a snowflake pic but didn’t have the energy to break out the big camera so I tried to get one with my phone. This snowflake only exists here now. I love this shot!

  • Today

    Today I walked Today I ranToday I laughedToday I interacted with others Today I did those thingsbecause I couldbecause tomorrow, I might not.

  • New year, Same Me??

    The grind begins again. Another year where I say that I will make changes, but will this be another year, like all the past ones, that I don’t? I hope not. This will be the second year since Mom died, and I still feel as rudderless as I did in the months after she died.…

  • Overthinking, Over Analyzing

    I continue to be stuck in this loop of thinking about big life decisions, planning out how to implement them, getting discouraged, getting depressed, giving up and then restarting the whole process. I’m afraid. I’m afraid to make the wrong decision or mess up the right decision so I don’t make any decision which is…