My Journey

Tag: self-reflection

  • nobody

    Nobody can hurt me,Like me. I know exactly where,To place the knife. Where to cut and,When to twist, To inflict the most pain. My mind is a bad neighborhood,A place, sometimes most of the time, even I don’t want to be. But it’s mine.For better,And worse.

  • Expecting … Nothing

    My anxiety shows up as trying to map every possible outcome of every decision I make. Meeting up with friends? I have to look at the route to the place we’re meeting, the parking situation, the possible conversation topics and plan out potential replies. When it’s time to go do the thing I’m so exhausted…

  • Good Things

    It’s been a good week! That’s really all I have to say right now! 🙂

  • Reclaiming My Time

    I’ve been spending too much time doom/rage/mindlessly scrolling on social media. Today I finished The Chaos Machine by Max Fisher and even before I finished it I was cutting back on social media. It’s a well written, meticulously sourced book and left me feeling pretty bad about the amount of time and energy I put…

  • Today

    Today I walked Today I ranToday I laughedToday I interacted with others Today I did those thingsbecause I couldbecause tomorrow, I might not.

  • New year, Same Me??

    The grind begins again. Another year where I say that I will make changes, but will this be another year, like all the past ones, that I don’t? I hope not. This will be the second year since Mom died, and I still feel as rudderless as I did in the months after she died.…

  • Overthinking, Over Analyzing

    I continue to be stuck in this loop of thinking about big life decisions, planning out how to implement them, getting discouraged, getting depressed, giving up and then restarting the whole process. I’m afraid. I’m afraid to make the wrong decision or mess up the right decision so I don’t make any decision which is…

  • In A Rut

    I’m stuck. My creative wheels are spinning and I’m not making any progress. I made my first “real” Youtube video almost 2 months ago and while I have ideas for more I haven’t taken any action to turn them into a reality. Every day that passes I beat myself for not taking even a single…

  • Boring and Uninteresting

    That’s something my mom would say about people who didn’t have, what she called, a curious mind. I used to think it was pretty harsh but now I get it. With a curious mind you seek out other points of view and expand your understanding on the world around you and the history of the…

  • Life Changes

    I keep thinking and writing about making changes in my life but I don’t do them. I know making big changes isn’t good for me even though it has worked out ok in the past. I feel like I have too much at risk if it’s the wrong decision. If I’m being perfectly honest I…