Caffeine and Journals

Tag: Anxiety

  • Photography Journey: Next Steps

    I spent 6 days in New York City in September and it helped me determine where I want to go with my photography. I gravitate towards street photography and have for the last 3-4 years. The “problem” is that I live in a place where I can’t really explore the genre. I’ve gone to events…

  • So Hard

    Why is it so hard to believe in myself? I’m laying here at almost midnight and my brain is running through all the ways I can fail both profesionally and personally. That in and of itself isn’t a new thing for me. Most nights I have those thoughts, hell, most days I have to those…

  • Rough

    It’s been a rough few months. I don’t know if I’m back to posting regularly on here or not. I’ve been in survival mode and now I feel like I’m starting to come out of it I don’t want to jump back hard and heavy into anything and get overwhelmed again. I call the last…

  • Blocked

    I’ve gone quiet here. Because I don’t know what to say. My brain reels trying to take in everything that’s happening in my life, in the world and turn it into something, anything. And I can’t. I’m angry, I’m sad, I’m frustrated and all the other bad feelings that I can’t think of right now.…

  • The Power of Words

    I’ve written about getting seriously into poetry earlier this year and it all started with a book by Iain S. Thomas called Everything You Cannot Say. I randomly picked up this book at a new local bookstore called Blackbird Coffee and Books and before I knew it I was over halfway through it and had…

  • Mother’s Day

    This will be the 2nd Mother’s Day since mom died. She wasn’t the biggest fan of the holiday, or so she said, but the few times I forgot I could tell it affected her. From then on I did my best to at least get her a card and/or a plant even when I wasn’t…

  • New year, Same Me??

    The grind begins again. Another year where I say that I will make changes, but will this be another year, like all the past ones, that I don’t? I hope not. This will be the second year since Mom died, and I still feel as rudderless as I did in the months after she died.…

  • In A Rut

    I’m stuck. My creative wheels are spinning and I’m not making any progress. I made my first “real” Youtube video almost 2 months ago and while I have ideas for more I haven’t taken any action to turn them into a reality. Every day that passes I beat myself for not taking even a single…

  • Uninspired

    I’ve been pretty uninspired in my day to day life for the past month or so. Everything has a dull tone to it, even things I regularly enjoy. These feelings come and go with me and have for many, many years. I have clinical depression and I’m not currently on any type of medication for…

  • Goings On

    End of July and pretty much the entire month of August was a pretty rough stretch for me. July marked a one year anniversary of my mom’s death and then my birthday was at the end of August. I suppose that I am officially in my “late 40’s” which is not a thought that brings…